Being in a relationship, especially in one where it makes you vulnerable to heartbreak and searing emotions, can be scary.
He is the first person that I have given myself up to completely, my heart, my mind and my soul. I didn’t expect upon our first meeting that he will be the most important man in my life, the one that I am willing to sacrifice my pride for and force myself to change for the better.
He asked me to be his, which I very willingly said yes to, and we expected things to turn out well just like that.
However, that is not to be.
As we all know, relationships aren’t all a bed of roses. Misunderstandings have been plaguing us one by one as we go through our day to day. It wasn’t because we weren’t affectionate towards each other nor any hard feelings towards each other, but we just simply could not understand each other/
Perhaps it is my fault. Maybe I have built up so many walls to protect myself from any form of hurt, and doubt every intention of others. Maybe I am hearing the things that he is telling me, but I did not really listen. Maybe he is finally showing his true self to me, but I shoot him down by criticizing his every action that he thought was a show of trust.
I want to get to know him better, deep down to his very core, but in my efforts to do so I ended up pushing him away even further. I thought that by talking about difficult things right from the start, it will be easier for us to communicate with each other, but I guess the way that I am approaching this is wrong.
I really want to get closer to the person I love, and not hold me at arm’s length because he doesn’t trust me, and that starts with me first. This is me hoping that this journey of love will last…
- Give him my trust first – whatever he does, always give benefit of the doubt and trust in his intentions
- Learn to be accepting of his mannerisms. Do not be so sensitive and always feel like I’m being personally attacked when he is not actually doing so. He only does certain things when he is completely comfortable with someone, and by criticizing him, he will only pull away from me
- SHOW, not tell, that I am a safety net that he can rely on. When he shares with me things, do not react or be judgmental, just accept him for who he is.
- Do not place my own expectations of him onto him as to who I want him to be, versus how he really is. It is unfair towards both of us.
- Tell him about my day and feelings every day. Have a 15 minute talk without expecting him to reciprocate.
- TOLERATE THE SEX TALK